Advice is great but never make a decision based solely on someone else’s opinion.
Everyone has advice or an opinion about how you should live, what you should or shouldn’t do and how you should or shouldn’t do it. That’s great, and can be somewhat helpful but first off, look at the advice giver. If they aren’t a shiny, happy, successful example of what they are telling you to do or what you would like to do, or be…take that advice with a grain of salt. How can someone give you directions to a place they haven’t been or have yet to make it to themselves? Don’t do it! Acknowledge what they are saying but please use your own brain. You, not them, are the ones that will have to deal with the consequences of whatever you are facing – So think for yourself!
Nobody is responsible for your happiness but you.
Don’t fall into the trap. You are responsible for your own happiness.Real happiness and contentment comes from the inside, happiness from the outside is far less consistent and short term. You have to learn to be content and happy, despite your circumstances, despite how your spouse is acting, despite what’s going on around you. If you can master self love and inner peace, you can find solace.
Money does not equal happiness.
It’s just the same misery, with more stuff. People will slave away to get MORE. More money, money clothes, house, cars..stuff, why, because they somehow think “My life would be so much better if I could just ________ or If I had ________. When and if, they attain what they think is going to make this huge change in their life and finally make them complete or happy, they are met with disappointment and emptiness. So it’s back to looking for something else, an endless circle. Sure, more money can make your life easier, not having to worry about some things and having security but there are a lot of people out there, with more money than most could imagine, that are absolutely miserable, unhappy and depressed. Besides that, it opens up a whole other can of worms which is; People will now be asking and expecting you to lend them money, borrow things, pay for meals while out with them, pay their way on outings. They also now think that “You have everything” and will overlook you on special occasions. your phone will now mostly be rung by people calling to “ask you a huge favour”. So, it’s a double edged sword. People now don’t take you into consideration and expect you to be happy and have no needs of your own. Oh, and don’t expect any of those people that are around, and that you’ve helped out to help you out or be around as much when and if they money goes..because they won’t.
You can love if you don’t love yourself, but it’s harder for you to accept love.
I hear people say this a lot. “How can you love her/him if you don’t love yourself” or/and “How can she/he love you if they don’t love themselves”. Well, ask any dysfunctional teen or adult in a relationship, if they love their partner and of course their answer is going to be yes. ( Well, most of the time ) Or try telling someone who maybe has low self esteem, or issues, that they don’t love someone they say they love.. Yeah, not going to go over too well. Everyone is capable of feeling love, falling in love and giving love but not loving yourself actually makes it harder for you to receive love, not give it. Not loving yourself completely can make it harder for you to accept that someone can love you, or believe they love you. It can make you self sabotage a relationship, thinking they are just going to leave anyway or not letting you trust them or what they say. It can amplify insecurities and jealousy or on the other hand, allow people to treat you poorly, abuse you or walk all over you, because you feel like you don’t deserve any better, won’t get better or are unlovable. On the opposite end, it can cause you to put walls up and push away those who are actually genuine and good for you. Telling someone that they can’t love because they don’t love themselves is just like telling them that they are not worthy of love. Love can heal and it takes patience. Even the most broken of us can be put together and built up with real, genuine, unconditional love. So don’t condemn others or yourself believing that saying is true. Don’t under estimate the power of love.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. – 1 Corinthians 13:13
People are going to talk about you, regardless.
People are going to talk about you, whether you are doing bad or good. You cannot live your life trying to please people, it’s impossible. Even the greatest intent can be demonized. You have to develop a tough skin because if you care too much about other peoples opinions of you, you’re going to live in never ending misery. It doesn’t matter what negative things people say about you, just don’t make them true. Be you, do right, live your best life and don’t worry about what they are saying about you. Miserable people are going to be miserable people and there will always be someone who dislikes you and would love to bring you down, do not let them win. They want it to hurt you, they want it to bring you down and they want to see your light go out. Live and shine. As long as you are doing right, you won’t go wrong and the better you do, the more they will try to break you down. Hurt people, hurt people. If the people gossiping about you were happy, content with themselves and their lives, then they wouldn’t be so focused on you. Don’t pity them but don’t bring yourself down to their level either. Stay positive and keep the focus on you and your own life. There is freedom if you can get past the bondage of letting gossip and rumours affect you.
“A man’s reputation is what other people think of him; his character is what he really is.”
No one gossips about other people’s secret virtues.
Work on you and everything will fall into place.
“You’ll never leave where you are, until you decide where you’d rather be.”